One of the most common excuses people give for procrastinating and not completing tasks is that the are “ lazy”. We can all relate to the feeling of not wanting to exert ourselves, especially for a difficult or “non-stop preferred” task. A lazy episode is normal, however by using the label of lazy to describe yourself, you predict that you will not accomplish much in your life. The longer you stay lazy, the more of a habit it becomes. Here is what is really going on with people who do life in a lazy way. Insecurity and fear of failure often stops a person from taking action. Insecure thoughts, such as “ I probably won’t do it right or be able to complete it,” suggest failure and therefore discourages taking action. A generalized negative pattern of thoughts such as, “ doing it really doesn’t matter” or “if I take the time to do it, I won’t be able to do anything else”, creates a no win situation.
Children who are not encouraged to set goals and are not given responsibilities by their parents are prone to being lazy. Lazy behaviors lead to under-achieving which causes shame and depression. To break the pattern of being lazy, stop calling yourself “a lazy person” and start addressing your fears and insecurities. Then set small daily goals and reward yourself for any action you take towards that goal. It’s not about doing things perfectly, it’s about action vs in-action.
Rebecca Sperber, M.S., MFT